


Wouldn’t It Be Nice

by Anonymous



Series: Reunited [1]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Crying, Fix-It-Fic, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Reddie, except not really because Stan’s still dead and it’s not fully fixed until he’s alive, i guess mentions of gore?, like not really but yeah, memory loss can’t stop these bitches, please your honor they’re in love, there’s probably more tags but i can’t think of any cause i’m dumb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-28
Updated: 2019-12-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:27:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21998242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Eddie wakes up in a cavern alone and scared, unsure of what’s happening or where the rest of The Losers are. After finding his way out, he sets off to find the love of his life.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Series: Reunited [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1583530
Comments: 1
Kudos: 44
Collections: Anonymous





	Wouldn’t It Be Nice

The first thing that Eddie registered was the dark. It was almost too dark, it made him wish he was back in his childhood room with his He-Man nightlight. After his mother kissed him goodnight with her traditional “Goodnight, Eddie Bear,” he would insist that she turned on the nightlight. If she refused, for reasons he still doesn’t understand, he would start sobbing until he gagged and his mother would fly across the room to shove his inhaler in his mouth.

But the darkness wasn’t the worst part. The worst part was by far the silence and loneliness of the cavern. The last time he remembered being here... that’s right! Eddie and the rest of The Losers were fighting Pennywise, minus Stan and Mike. A sudden sadness swept over Eddie as he realized that Stan had died with an immeasurable amount of fear in his heart that none of them could understand and he didn’t know if Mike was still alive or not after almost being murdered by Bowers. He would have to shove down those thoughts for now though, and focus on what the hell was going on.

Eddie looked down at himself and gasped. A giant hole had ripped through the front of his shirt, and he was covered in blood. There was no visible wound, but he had a sinking feeling that the blood was his. He patted himself down, feeling no injuries except for a couple of scrapes.

“What the hell,” he whispered to himself.

Then Eddie realized that he was completely alone in the cavern, with no idea why or how he got there. His memory was still fuzzy on the events before he passed out, but he vaguely remembered Richie’s face looming over his, tears rolling down his cheeks. Eddie’s face blushed suddenly at the thought of Richie.

“Goddamnit dude, pull yourself together.” Eddie had no time to blush like some little girl at the idea of his childhood crush. Moving away from Derry and forgetting his love for the other boy had been a relief, he didn’t have to think about how much he loved Richie “Trashmouth” Tozier and how fucked he was for being a guy who loved another guy. Coming back to Derry had been a nightmare, because he had been hit with all of his past love for Richie all at once.

Pushing Richie’s face to the back of his subconscious, Eddie stood up and immediately almost collapsed again. His muscles felt weak and unused, Eddie wondered how long he had been out for. Hours? Days? Weeks? Okay, the last one seemed a bit improbable, but even just the concept of being alone in this cavern for weeks was incredibly unnerving.

Eddie tried once more to stand up, and after some swearing and leaning on some boulders, he managed to stand upright unassisted. He looked around the cavern as his memories flooded back. The ritual of Chüd, that fucking Pomeranian, getting stabbed, Richie once again hovering over him with a desperate look in his eyes. And then, nothing.

Eddie shuddered as a single thought crossed his mind. Did he die? No, of course not, that was a stupid and foolish thought to have. How would he be alive if he had been stabbed? Hold that thought, where did the wound go? Eddie looked back down at his stomach to examine the wound that somehow no longer existed. It didn’t seem possible, how could a wound like that just disappear? He decided to think about that when he got out of Pennywise’s layer.

Stumbling around in the dark, he managed to find a flashlight by stepping on it and almost falling on his face. He scrambled for the source of light and hurried to turn it on, breathing a sigh of relief when a stream of bright light was emitted. He swung it around, trying to remember the layout of the cavern and how to get out.

How did the other Losers get out? They were horrible with directions, and constantly relied on Eddie for finding their way through the sewers.

Picking through his memory, Eddie finally found the tunnel that he had entered through and carefully picked his way through, being careful not to stumble or fall. Hours later, Eddie had walked for miles, half swam through disgusting sewers, and almost gotten lost multiple times. Eddie finally saw a strip of sunlight and realized it was coming from the tunnel they had entered from. Overjoyed, he ran the rest of the way towards the ladder. Pulling himself up as fast as possible, he somehow managed to push the grate off of the top and climb out.

That first breath of clean air was probably the best breath of air Eddie had ever taken, even better than the feeling of his aspirator opening up his lungs for him when his asthma kicked in. After taking what felt like minutes to catch his breath, Eddie looked up and took in his surroundings. Figuring out where he was, he walked through The Barrens in a daze before finally reaching civilization. He walked through the town, looking around at ruined building after building. Some roads were caved in completely, and there were burst pipes that were dripping a steady stream of water.

Reaching the library, Eddie pushed open the glass doors and walked up to the help desk. His heart sank when he realized Mike wasn’t behind the desk. Instead, it was some preppy young teenage girl who wore a very see-through shirt with no bra. Eddie averted his gaze, blushing. He felt no attraction to her, but it was still awkward.

“Excuse me, do you know where I could reach Mike Hanlon?” Eddie leaned on the desk and hoped he didn’t look as bad as he smelled.

The girl looked up at him and wrinkled her nose. “Bed rest, doctor’s orders. They let him leave the hospital, but he’s still in recovery.” Eddie breathed a sigh of relief. Mike was alive!

“Do you happen to have his address?” Eddie asked hopefully. If he could find Mike, then maybe he could—no, he shouldn’t even go there.

“Yeah sure.” The girl grabbed a piece of paper and scribbled down an address. Handing the paper to him, she looked at him expectantly. Eddie faltered for a second, then realized she was probably waiting for him to leave. He gave her a quick grateful nod before turning around and bolting out of the library.

Checking the address, he walked as fast as he could towards Mike’s house. Thankfully, he lived close to the library. Perks of being a librarian, he guessed. Eddie silently thanked Mike that he didn’t stay on his parent's farm. Reaching the small one story house, Eddie practically jumped up the stairs and spammed the doorbell like he would win a million dollars for every push.

After about a minute of repeatedly pressing the doorbell, the door swung open to reveal a very angry Mike. His look of anger was quickly replaced with disbelief, shortly followed by happiness.

“Eddie?” Mike whispered.

“Yeah man, it’s me. I kinda woke up in Pennywise’s layer and figured that you’d probably still be in Derry. Can I come inside?” Eddie fidgeted with the hole in his shirt, scared that Mike would believe he was an imposter and slam the door in his face. Thankfully, Mike ushered him in with a wave of his hand. Following Mike inside, Eddie noticed he had a pretty intense limp. He figured that Mike hadn’t totally recovered from his encounter with Henry.

“What the hell man? The rest of the Losers said It stabbed you in the stomach and you died. It’s been two weeks!” Mike stared at Eddie, expectantly waiting for an answer.

“I’ve been out for two fucking weeks?! That’s not possible.” Eddie was dumbfounded. How had he died and then just stayed in the cavern for two whole weeks without anything happening to him? “If I died, how am I here? My wound closed up and everything.”

Mike was silent for a second before responding. “Look at your hands, does anything seem off?”

Eddie held his hands up to his face and stared intently. Nothing appeared out of the ordinary. Sure, his hands were grimy and cut up, but they seemed fine. That’s when it hit him. “My scars are gone. The ones Stan gave everyone after we fought Pennywise for the first time.”

“Exactly,” Mike started, “Everyone’s scars disappeared after It died. Maybe once It died, all of the wounds It helped cause vanished. Maybe a mortal wound just takes more time to heal.”

“Yeah that sounds right,” Eddie agreed. “Could I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“What happened to everyone else?” Eddie questioned. He really just wanted to know about Richie, but he couldn’t just tell Mike that.

“Everyone went back home, Bill and Audra just left yesterday. I hope you aren’t planning on calling any of them.”

“Why?”

“They’re forgetting again. I doubt any of them will ever remember Derry again, even if they come back. Hell, even I’m starting to forget and I haven’t even left yet.”

Eddie’s heart sank. Richie would probably never remember him ever again, and Eddie would never be able to confess his love to the one person he had ever loved.

Mike must have seen the heartbreak on his face, because he instantly moved to reassure Eddie. “This is about Richie, isn’t it? You could probably still fly out to see him, maybe you can get him to remember.”

Hope flooded through Eddie’s system the instant those words left Mike’s mouth. He could still find Richie, and maybe…

“That sounds like a great idea, thanks Mike.” Eddie smiled softly, already planning the next couple of days in his head. “I think I’m going to go home first and get cleaned up, then schedule a flight out to California. Do you have any idea how to find him?”

“Yeah I can give you the city, and I know he’s doing stand-up so you could probably meet him at one of his shows.” Understanding shined through in Mike’s eyes. He hadn’t been in love for a long time, but the look in Eddie’s eyes reminded him of a better time. A time full of young, reckless kids who had been to hell and back together and refused to be separated. Until they were pried apart by those who didn’t understand, those same kids and the memories they shared lost, until they were reunited.  
~~~  
After a two hour-long shower spent scrubbing his skin raw and 10 minutes spent on his phone buying tickets for the earliest flight from Maine to Los Angeles possible, Eddie was ready to be done with Derry. No more childhood bullies, or killer clowns, or dying in a cavern. Eddie was eager to reconnect with his childhood crush and maybe start something more. That last part terrified him, but Eddie was used to it now. Yet the fear mingled with other emotions, like hope and love and the will to fight for what he loved, who he loved.

Eddie was about to call a cab to come pick him up when his phone started ringing. Looking at the caller ID, his heart sank. The name “Myra Kaspbrak” blared at him while Can’t Help Falling in Love blasted from the phone speakers. Eddie was sick of that song, but Myra insisted on playing it nonstop. “We played that at our wedding, remember Eddie?” She’d say. “A song as special as that has to be commemorated somehow. You can make it my ringtone, so you’ll always know when I need you.” Watching the phone continue to blare, Eddie let the call end and go to voicemail. Myra was part of Past Eddie, and he had no desire to go back. Blocking her number, Eddie called a cab.  
~~~  
One plane ride later, Eddie was sitting in the back of yet another cab on his way to yet another hotel. He was glad he made a decent amount of money, because this cross-country plane trip was turning into a huge expense.

Once he was dropped off at his hotel, Eddie finally took a moment to breathe. It felt like he had been holding his breath for the last 12 hours. He took a puff from his inhaler and tried to relax.

After checking into the hotel and flopping onto his uncomfortable bed, Eddie pulled out his phone and searched for Richie’s shows. He sighed in relief; there was one that night. Eddie bought one of the last tickets and called another cab. This routine was getting tiring.

Fifteen minutes later, Eddie was sitting at a bar somewhere in Malibu, waiting for Richie to come on stage. He had ordered a beer and for the last five minutes he had been there, he had already gotten looks from the bartender, two guys, and three girls. Eddie ignored them all.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the stage, Richieee Tozier!” The stage announcer’s voice died out, swallowed by clapping. Eddie didn’t hear any of it as his heart stopped momentarily. There he was, in all his dumbass glory. Richie was in slacks and a t-shirt, his five o'clock shadow was shown more prominently in the light.

Richie waved at the crowd before silencing them with a wave of his hand. “Hello Malibu!” The crowd cheered again. “Wow, it is great to be back. I visited the East Coast a while back and man, it does not compare.” A drunk audience member whooped and Richie pointed at him. “This guy knows what I’m talking about.”

As Richie told a couple of jokes, Eddie zoned out. Staring at the man on stage, he grew scared. What if he didn’t remember him? What if he did? One of Eddie scariest thoughts, what if he was straight? That last once couldn’t possibly be true, Eddie had seen him down a shot without his hands. No straight man was capable of that.

Consumed by his thoughts, Eddie hardly noticed when Richie’s set was finished. He jumped out of his seat and darted after Richie. He had flown all the way across the country, he was not about to lose him now.

Breathing heavily, Eddie speed-walked backstage. Pulling out his inhaler, he took a deep breath in right as he made eye-contact with Richie.

Richie’s eyes widened in surprise and Eddie’s heart soared. He remembered!

“Hey!” Richie called. “What the hell are you doing back here? Performers and management only.” Eddie’s heart sank until it felt like it was being digested. Richie didn’t remember. Eddie had arrived too late.

“I, I’m sorry, I was just watching the show and I thought you were really funny. I was hoping I could buy you a drink?” Eddie looked at him hopefully, praying the other man would accept his offer.

“Sorry, I don’t get drunk with fans. It’s a personal rule. Not looking to get murdered.”

Eddie started babbling. “No no no, that’s not my intention at all. I just thought your jokes deserved a drink. I promise I’m not a murderer. Too much strain on my lungs to lug a dead body around.”

Richie hummed. “I suppose I could have a couple of drinks. Sure, I’ll meet you at the bar in five. By the way, what’s your name?”

“Eddie.”

“Thanks Eddie.”

Eddie gave a little nod and darted out from backstage. He was hit with the strong smell of alcohol and he knew he’d probably have to get very drunk if he was to survive the rest of the night.

Sitting down at the bar, he gestured for two pints of beer and rested his head in his arms. God, why was he so stupid. Falling for his childhood friend who didn’t remember him. Feeling a tap on his head, Eddie jumped up.

“Woah, dude, no need to freak. It’s just me.” Richie smiled at him. “Aw, you already got me a pint. Thanks Eds.”

Eddie’s heart jumped at the nickname. “Eds?” He questioned.

“Don’t judge the nickname, it just felt right,” Richie defended.

Eddie smiled into his beer. Maybe the night wouldn't suck after all.  
~~~  
A couple of drinks later, Eddie and Richie were still sitting at the bar. Eddie had been counting his drinks but lost count somewhere around five. He swore Richie got more handsome with every drink, which meant he didn’t want to stop drinking.

“Sooo,” Richie slurred, letting out a little laugh. “What brings you here to the lovely city of Malibu?”

Stalling, Eddie tried to think of an excuse. “Vacation. I just left my wife and I needed to get away.”

Richie raised an eyebrow. “Was she pretty?”

“God no.” Eddie laughed. “She reminded me of my mother a bit too much. I’m probably gay, and even I could see she wasn’t attractive.”

“Probably?” Richie questioned.

“Well,” Eddie started. “I’m not sure. I mean, I’m hopelessly in love with this guy and I was raised in a super homophobic environment so I sort of shoved it all down inside. Now I don’t know what to do.”

Shifting in his seat, Richie took a sip of his beer. “What’s the guy like?”

Eddie blushed into his drink. “Well, I’ve known him since I was a kid, we actually grew up together. I used to think he was stupid and annoying, but he grew on me. He was one of those rebellious stoner kids, you know the type. And I was completely sheltered by my mom who was convinced everything would give me cancer. She was a real gem. Anyways, some small part of me was convinced that he liked me back, although I was never really positive. I guess now I’ll never know.” Eddie sighed and downed his beer, signaling the bartender for another.

Tilting his head, Richie asked “Why? Did he die or something?”

Eddie chuckled. “No, he…” Fumbling for an excuse, he filled the time by taking a sip of the beer the bartender had placed in front of him. “I moved away when we were young and now I doubt he remembers me anymore. I guess it’s for the best.”

Richie spluttered. “That’s bullshit! If you love him, why don’t you go after him?” Richie stood up and climbed onto the table.

“Richie what the fuck are you doing? Get down from there, you could get hurt!”

“Lovely patrons, I have a question to ask you all!” Richie gave a carefree smile and Eddie fell even harder for him. “My friend here is hopelessly in love with someone but doesn’t know if they still remember him. Should he go after them anyways?”

The drunk patrons cheered, some clearly not knowing what they were cheering for. Richie bowed, a smile plastered on his face. Jumping off of the table, he sat back down, his face flushed red.

“Oh my god, you absolute dumbass why would you do that?” Eddie’s face burned with embarrassment.

“You needed to realize how stupid you’re sounding right now.” Richie’s eyes sparkled with determination and he grabbed Eddie’s hands. “It doesn’t matter if he doesn’t remember you, force yourself back into his life if you have to. Don’t give up. Listen to your heart, before it’s too late.” Eddie saw the light go out of Richie’s eyes as he let go of his hands and put his head in his arms.

Eddie leaned forward to peak under Richie’s arms. “You okay dude? I thought you were supposed to be consoling me, not the other way around.”

Richie sat up, wiping away tears. “Yeah it’s fine, I just got really emotional for a second. But don’t worry about me, I wanna help you get your happy ending. I can—“

Just then, some drunks roughhousing slammed into Eddie and he was thrown onto the ground. His head slammed onto the tile and everything went dark.  
~~~  
Coming back to his senses, Eddie groaned. He had passed out yet again, with no idea where he was, yet again. Opening his eyes, Eddie let out a hiss. Everything was too bright he didn’t know how to deal with it. Eddie froze. Wa— was he in a bed? He looked down and sure enough, he was tucked into some very comfortable black silk sheets. The question was, how did he get there? Eddie had started a habit of waking up in strange places and he wasn’t too fond of it, although he had to admit this place was much more comfortable than the cavern.

Eddie decided his first priority should be to check himself and make sure he wasn’t about to die before he did anything drastic. Moving his arms slowly, he patted himself down. There was a killer bump on the side of his head that made Eddie gulp, but that was it.

He pulled the sheets back and slid off the bed, making sure he wasn’t going to collapse as soon as he stood up. Standing up as slowly as possible, Eddie’s vision went blurry and he reached out blindly, knocking over some books on the bedside table. The sound of the books hitting the floor made Eddie’s head ring and he winced. “Shit,” he whispered.

The bedroom door swung open and Eddie turned his head, to find Richie standing there in nothing but his boxers.

“Are you okay?” Richie called out.

“I...uh…” Eddie was at a loss for words. Richie, his childhood crush, was standing there half naked, and Eddie saw skin he hadn’t seen since they were kids. He felt his face burn with embarrassment as he started to run his fingers through his hair nervously.

“Could you possibly tell me where I am and what's happening? I’m a bit confused.” Eddie spoke to the floor, too embarrassed to meet Richie’s concerned eyes.

“Oh fuck, yeah totally dude. Some assholes knocked you over and you hit your head pretty hard. The bartender told me it happens all the time and I should probably just take you home and give you some aspirin when you woke up. I, uh, wasn't sure where you were staying so I just took you home.” Richie finished the explanation with a grin, and Eddie felt himself blush again. Richie had said home, not his home. “Our home,” some small part of his mind whispered.

“Oh yeah, by the way, I put you in my bed cause I don’t have a guest room and the couch isn’t as comfy.”

“Well, I suppose a thank you’s in order.” Eddie chuckled. “Thanks for not leaving me in that bar to die or something.” Eddie tried to pass off Richie’s gesture as not super important, Eddie’s a big strong man who hasn’t already internally melted completely at the kind gesture, blah blah blah. In reality, Eddie could not believe his luck. He was in Richie’s house! In his room! With Richie half naked! Okay, that sounded a bit creepy, but still!

Richie interrupted Eddie’s internal thoughts with a muffled cough. “I can get us something to eat if you’re hungry? Anything you want, my treat.”

Eddie gave him a small smile. “How about some Chinese food?”  
~~~  
“Alright! Way too much Chinese takeout at 10:00 AM, coming right up!” Richie walked into the living room with two plastic bags full of takeout containers. He had put on some clothes to Eddie’s disappointment and given Eddie some clean clothes to wear, which he was pleased to report smelled like Richie. 

“Wanna see if there’s anything good on TV? Your pick.” Richie placed the bags on the coffee table and started unpacking the food.

Eddie grabbed the remote and started flipping through channels. Landing on a movie rerun starring Audra Denbrough, he smiled and let the movie play.

The two men sat on Richie’s couch eating as much Chinese food as their hearts desired until they had eaten everything Richie bought. God, Eddie’s mom would have never let him eat any of this. She’d probably go on about how bad it is for him and then shove homegrown vegetables down his throat.

Hearing Richie let out a gasp, Eddie’s head shot up. He had pulled out some fortune cookies and was staring at them with a look of absolute horror on his face. Watching Richie start to hyperventilate, Eddie shoved his inhaler in the other man’s mouth and triggered the release of flavored air.

“What the fuck Eds I don’t want any of your placebo medicine,” Richie spluttered. Eddie’s eyes widened. “I—oh my god that sounded so rude I’m sorry dude I’m sure your inhaler is very important to you…” Richie trailed off when he finally met Eddie’s eyes.

“Why’d you call me Eds?” He questioned. “That’s the second time.”

“I don’t know,” Richie faltered. “There’s like this tiny voice in my head that just keeps calling you Eds. If it’s making you uncomfortable I can stop, I’ve been told before that I’m annoying and rude.”

Eddie smiled softly. This was no longer the annoying, trashmouth boy he once knew. This was a man who had been torn down time and time again by society and realized it was better to be quiet than to speak his mind. Of course, his mind tended to have a mind of its own and didn’t always fully communicate with his brain before speaking.

“Why’d you freak with the fortune cookies?” Eddie asked softly. “It’s okay, I won’t find anything you say weird. I’ve had a rough couple of weeks.”

Eddie watched Richie carefully, all his tiny habits that made his heart flutter. Fidgeting with his glasses, twiddling his thumbs, spinning a backstage pass wristband around his wrist. Eddie looked into his eyes, but Richie was far away. “Far away in Derry?” He thought.

“Richie? Hey dude you with me?”

Richie snapped back to reality, some unknown emotions filling his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I’m with you. Just thinking.” He sighed. “Okay, so recently I know I went to the East Coast, but I have no idea what happened. It’s like my brain doesn’t want me to remember. One time I just started crying, and I couldn’t tell if it was happiness or sadness. Maybe both. Sometimes someone will say something or do something and I just—can’t hold it together. I’ve just been having this tug-of-war with my brain and I feel like I’m going to fall apart. Like I’m walking a tightrope and my memories will shove me off into a crocodile pit. It’s terrifying. I’m getting ready to jump in the pit myself, memories or no memories.” Putting his head in his hands, Richie scrubbed his face and sighed.

Eddie scooted over on the couch and put his arms around Richie. “I’m going to tell you something, but you can’t judge me or tell me I’m lying. Can you do that?” Richie gave a silent nod. “We’ve met before. Even grew up together.” Richie gave a sharp breath in.

“What do you mean?”

“What do you remember from your childhood?”

Richie paused. “I…” he shook his head. “Nothing. It’s blocked out, like an empty void. But I remember feeling pain, and sadness. Lots of sadness. I...miss someone. I keep feeling this sense of loneliness, like half of me is missing. Why?” Richie turned to look up at Eddie, and he felt his chest tighten. Tears started to well up in RIchie’s eyes, a look of hopelessness on his face.

“I’m not going to tell you everything because I don’t want to hurt you. But we grew up together on the East Coast and dealt with some bad stuff and bad people. And you were so incredibly brave, all the time.” He laughed. “I was always a coward. But we moved away and forgot everything. Lived relatively normal lives. Then one of our friends called and brought us all back together. Then…” Eddie took a shaky breath. “Something bad happened. To me. Then you came back here and forgot everything again, which explains the gap in your memory that you can’t explain.”

“Why did I leave you? If we were friends and something bad happened to you, I should have been there for you.”

Eddie smiled gently. “It wasn’t your fault, no one knew.”

“Knew what?”

“That I was alive.”

Richie’s eyes widened in surprise. “What? How? Was it some dramatic scene in a hospital where you flatlined and we all left sobbing, only for you to be revived?”

“Well,” Eddie started, “Not exactly. I’m trying to tell you as little as possible to not screw up your memories but you did have a good reason to think I died.” That’s because I did, but Richie doesn’t need to know that. Eddie froze. Oh shit, he died. Something in him probably ‘reset’ like a hidden cheat code in a video game.

“Hey Eds, you still with me?” Richie snapped his fingers in front of Eddie’s face.

“Y...yeah, I think I’m…” Everything seemed out of focus, which scared Eddie. Did he have a concussion from when he hit his head? Was he sick? Could he be—

Lips on lips. Richie’s lips to be exact. His slightly chapped lips pressing against Eddie’s soft ones. Eddie leaned into the kiss, savoring the moment. God, he could do this for hours. Why weren’t people kissing all the time? Richie pressed his cold hands onto Richie’s cheeks, causing him to jump.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have done that it’s just you weren’t responding and I wanted to bring you back from where’ve you were feel free to leave or punch me or something I’m so fucking stupid oh my god—“

This time it was Eddie’s turn to cut off Richie, their lips pressed together once again. Richie sighed into the kiss and Eddie tentatively pressed his palm against Richie’s chest. Richie’s heart was going a million miles an hour, Eddie thought it would pop out of his chest. Richie bit Eddie’s lower lip and he gasped. Richie slipped his tongue into Eddie’s mouth and he felt himself ascend. If only teenage Eddie could see him now. He tasted something salty and he pulled away. Tears were streaming down Richie’s face, his cheeks flushed.

“Was I that bad?” Eddie asked nervously.

“God no Eds, you were amazing. I’m just, feeling a lot of things right now. You talking about us growing up together sparked something in me. I’m probably acting like a horny teenage boy right now, you’re probably really annoyed with me.” Richie scrubbed his face as Eddie began to giggle. Richie looked up at him as he began to laugh harder. “What?”

“It’s just, you really haven’t changed. You’ve always been a horny teenage boy, it’s just we all thought you were straight.”

“Yeah well, I did too until like five minutes ago. Well...I guess I always had certain thoughts and urges that most straight men don’t have but I always shoved it down and ignored it. Some kind of trauma that I can’t seem to remember. It has something to do with where we grew up, doesn’t it?”

Eddie smiled. “Smart as always, Chee. Did you ever...act on those impulses?”

Richie sighed. “There was one tim in college, I got buzzed at a party and some dude was eyeing me across the room. He winked and I winked back and it felt good. God, it felt so good to even wink. He walked over and asked if we wanted to get out of there and I said yes. He took me to his dorm and started to kiss me, ran his hands all over me. Then he touched my dick and I punched him out of instinct and ran. Had a panic attack on the way back to my dorm and couldn’t fall asleep. I was scared that someone was coming for me, that they had somehow seen. That they were coming to punch me and stab me and god knows what else. Never again after that. Only women. Sure, women are great, but I always felt like something was missing. So yeah, that’s my tragic backstory. At least, the parts I remember.”

Eddie stared in shock. Richie had gone through all of this, and still kissed him. Didn’t hesitate, just went straight for it. That took trust. Tears started to stream down Eddie’s face.

“Holy shit are you okay? Was it something I said?” Richie stared at him nervously, afraid to touch him.

“I’m fine, I’m just really overcome with a lot of emotions right now. You went through all this traumatic shit with your sexuality and I just...stayed in the closet.”

“Hey dude there’s nothing wrong with the closet. I’ve been there a long time, there’s a huge selection of ties in there for some reason.” Eddie snorted as the two of them collapsed in a fit of laughter.

“God, I’ve missed your jokes. You’re really fucking funny, don’t let anyone tell you you’re not. Especially me.”

Richie grinned. “I’ll keep it in mind,” he said jokingly.

Eddie took a shaky breath in. “Can we, can we try? To make this work? Cause I’ve waited way too long for this and I don’t want to give up on this.”

“This?”

“Us.”

Richie smiled. “Anything for you Eds. I don’t really remember you, but I can tell that my whole life used to revolve around you. I’m ready to continue that for as long as I’m alive.”

Eddie blushed and flopped his whole body onto the couch, his head in Richie’s lap. His surroundings faded to black as Richie ran his fingers through his hair. He could get used to this.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my reddie trash, I spent way too long on this but I finished it and that’s what matters.


End file.
